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Survival gifts by Anne Cooper
Survival gifts by Anne Cooper
Recently I was accosted by a woman on Brixton High Street. She was wired, rambling and persistent, with a convoluted story about her sister’s birthday, had to “get a cake”, “get to Croydon”. I figured it was a line. Though visibly vulnerable – frail and emaciated with teeth like the city skyline – I was irritated by her repetitive, borderline aggressive demands. I shook her off, walked away and stood at the bus stop in the fine drizzle filled with shame and remorse. I could see myself in her 25 years ago, desperately mad and homeless.
Though I never had to beg, it was a small act of kindness that gave me the will to carry on when I’d all but given up. That midwinter I was in a squat facing eviction and sat outside the Ritzy. I’d been looking for a room, any room. I took off my DM boots to ground myself, sinking my feet in the frosty grass, when a Ritzy worker came over with a coffee and cake.
Prior to that I’d coasted through hypermania into full-blown delusional mania then plunged headlong into what’s called a mixed state: manic and depressed. My delusions were no longer light-filled but dark and brooding, bordering on paranoia. Not a good look for house hunting.
During the hypermanic stage, I’d moved to the squat to avoid a former partner who had become self-destructive, prone to violence and stalkerish. I left my job teaching creative writing in a centre for people with mental health issues. I was yet to be diagnosed bipolar, but I’d read R D Laing, and now recognized myself in the service users. I was turned away from the Maudsley emergency clinic as I had insight, so not crazy enough for a bed.
Mental health problems are both the cause and consequence of homelessness and, not surprisingly, are exacerbated by the stress. There is a higher rate of mental health problems amongst the growing homeless population than the average.
I reflected on my past at the bus stop. Urgency seized me. I had to go back and find this woman, it was so obvious she was unwell. It didn’t take long.
“Do you still want to get a cake?” She did. Together we went into Iceland, choose one and waited at the till. She calmed down a bit, told me she was on a pass from a psychiatric unit. I asked if she had anywhere to go when she was discharged. She changed the subject. I took that as a no, and then we were at the bus stop. I just hoped her family would show some love and understanding.
The streets are a scary place if you are unwell, no place for someone experiencing anxiety and depression or, worse, paranoia and delusions. Mental health problems are considered an invisible illness, yet just as I can see someone with a mental health problem from the other side of the street, so can people that might take advantage. I was lucky my former employer referred me to Lambeth council. Eventually I was offered supported housing and eventually saw a psychiatrist who listened.
I don’t know what happened to that woman, but I know I would not have got through the bureaucracy and physical tasks of moving without the help of my parents, friends and services. It took me a long time to ask for help.
If you know someone whose behaviour has become erratic, chances are that they are unwell. If you find yourself in a similar situation, here are a few tips: walk tall, develop a routine, don’t trust everybody but do reach out and keeping reaching out until you get the help you need. Perseverance pays off. The best advice I’ve had when in crisis is to know that however bad it gets, this situation is temporary. Even if you are suicidal, as I was at times, it is temporary, and this too will pass.
Take it from me.
Call for help
- If you have suicidal thoughts talk to someone at Saneline (4:30–10:30pm) 0300 304 7000 or the Samaritans 116 123. CALLS ARE FREE.
- If you’re unwell and homeless or about to lose your home go to your local council. You are classed as “in priority need” because of your mental illness.
- If you need to find emergency accommodation, call Shelter for advice on how to deal with your local authority 0808 800 4444. CALLS ARE FREE.
- If you are already a mental health service user, tell your care
co-ordinator, psychiatrist or GP about your housing situation. - For mental health advice contact MIND 0300 123 3393 or Rethink (9:30am–4pm) 0300 5000 927. CALLS ARE FREE.
October – November 2024 : Change
CONTENTS
BACK ISSUES
- Issue 152 : October – November 2024 : Change
- Issue 151 : August – September 2024 : Being Heard
- Issue 150 : June – July 2024 : Reflections
- Issue 149 : April – May 2024 : Compassion
- Issue 148 : February – March 2024 : The little things
- Issue 147 : December 2023 – January 2024 : Next steps
- Issue 146 : October 2023 – November 2023 : Kind acts
- Issue 145 : August 2023 – September 2023 : Mental health
- Issue 144 : June 2023 – July 2023 : Community
- Issue 143 : April 2023 - May 2023 : Hope springs
- Issue 142 : February 2023 - March 2023 : New Beginnings
- Issue 141 : December 2022 - January 2023 : Winter Homeless
- Issue 140 : October - November 2022 : Resolve
- Issue 139 : August - September 2022 : Creativity
- Issue 138 : June - July 2022 : Practical advice
- Issue 137 : April - May 2022 : Connection
- Issue 136 : February - March 2022 : RESPECT
- Issue 135 : Dec 2021 - Jan 2022 : OPPORTUNITY
- Issue 134 : September-October 2021 : Losses and gains
- Issue 133 : July-August 2021 : Know Your Rights
- Issue 132 : May-June 2021 : Access to Healthcare
- Issue 131 : Mar-Apr 2021 : SOLUTIONS
- Issue 130 : Jan-Feb 2021 : CHANGE
- Issue 129 : Nov-Dec 2020 : UNBELIEVABLE
- Issue 128 : Sep-Oct 2020 : COPING
- Issue 127 : Jul-Aug 2020 : HOPE
- Issue 126 : Health & Wellbeing in a Crisis
- Issue 125 : Mar-Apr 2020 : MOVING ON
- Issue 124 : Jan-Feb 2020 : STREET FOOD
- Issue 123 : Nov-Dec 2019 : HOSTELS
- Issue 122 : Sep 2019 : DEATH ON THE STREETS
- Issue 121 : July-Aug 2019 : INVISIBLE YOUTH
- Issue 120 : May-June 2019 : RECOVERY
- Issue 119 : Mar-Apr 2019 : WELLBEING
- Issue 118 : Jan-Feb 2019 : WORKING HOMELESS
- Issue 117 : Nov-Dec 2018 : HER STORY
- Issue 116 : Sept-Oct 2018 : TOILET TALK
- Issue 115 : July-Aug 2018 : HIDDEN HOMELESS
- Issue 114 : May-Jun 2018 : REBUILD YOUR LIFE
- Issue 113 : Mar–Apr 2018 : REMEMBRANCE
- Issue 112 : Jan-Feb 2018
- Issue 111 : Nov-Dec 2017
- Issue 110 : Sept-Oct 2017
- Issue 109 : July-Aug 2017
- Issue 108 : Apr-May 2017
- Issue 107 : Feb-Mar 2017
- Issue 106 : Dec 2016 - Jan 2017
- Issue 105 : Oct-Nov 2016
- Issue 104 : Aug-Sept 2016
- Issue 103 : May-June 2016
- Issue 102 : Mar-Apr 2016
- Issue 101 : Jan-Feb 2016
- Issue 100 : Nov-Dec 2015
- Issue 99 : Sept-Oct 2015
- Issue 98 : July-Aug 2015
- Issue 97 : May-Jun 2015
- Issue 96 : April 2015 [Mini Issue]
- Issue 95 : March 2015
- Issue 94 : February 2015
- Issue 93 : December 2014
- Issue 92 : November 2014
- Issue 91 : October 2014
- Issue 90 : September 2014
- Issue 89 : July 2014
- Issue 88 : June 2014
- Issue 87 : May 2014
- Issue 86 : April 2014
- Issue 85 : March 2014
- Issue 84 : February 2014
- Issue 83 : December 2013
- Issue 82 : November 2013
- Issue 81 : October 2013
- Issue 80 : September 2013
- Issue 79 : June 2013
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